Alone in this world

Your words are sins that leave me feeling lethal

Propane Strong, and the smell eats you

But will it get through?

All of a sudden i feel i dont need you

I tried to be kind like Ghandi did to his peoples

You took advantage of what was at heart instead of mind,

I dont know what to call your kind

Confronting, conversation, impatient thats you

Im feeling consequencial, never suicidal

I should of examined this picture

It feels like world war one

drained and unfortunaly insane but i cant complain

I got the pieces that remain

Raged and eager in pain

Reality wont ever be the same.

As I reminisce its a shame and your name dont deserve a frame

Your existance damaged my brainI try to concentrate but your name is infratuated

And its exausting me, I thought I walked on this road cautiously

I should of stopped when the signs warned me

And now im alone in this world

Ps. I entered this poem in a poetry jam =]. This a throw back

Suicidal

The crowd surrounds me as they realize my physical mistake.
Im sitting in an oven and they're letting me bake.
I was warned but my head was to far out
and now im lost tossing about.
Watch those around you is what several say
I walk with no caution, going the wrong way.
Situations changing and the picture is too
& now im unaware of what to do
True colors show when you have no air to grasp
And instead of being first you end up last.
Life moves to fast and time sometimes move slow
So when it comes to certain people you just have to let go
Instead of making things work 
You just gotta let it flow
But ever think about in order to flow
It's yourself you gotta let go.


P.s This is how some people feel before they become suicidal. Im not suicidal dont get the wrong impression its just writing from a different perspective. However, you have the learn to rise about the negatives in order to see a better tomorrow.

Struggles

There are struggles yet to overcome
and when it comes to mistakes
We'll make more then one
Never let struggles serve as a guide
because they'll put you in a disguise and 
allow those to harshly describe.
Don't allow them to forsee because they'll
begin to make you question who you should be
A friend yet a enemy
that you shall not think of letting in


P.s As they say life is like a roller coaster but people fail to realize that even though you drop you'll eventually come back up.- Spencer

I am me

Life is a beautiful thing when you dare to be yourself. Especially when you're transitioning from fitting in to standing out from everyone else.-Spencer

12/14/08-09

Countless days I could almost remember
Being in your arms or you in mine.
What separated us is time.
You wanted things your way
and I wanted things to be mine
But we happened to come to the conclusion
everything would be fine.
Forever, we said it would be
You and me eternally but 
Rough times came as you played games
Bringing me to my pain and before we knew
things weren't the same.
We shxtted on each other but still we came back
Releasing secrets and made me recap
I promised i wouldn't go back
I never knew broken hearts could exist 
until i met you and its crazy what words really do
Smiles and laughs we had to
but how you hurt me & i would still go back
Thats how i knew i really loved you
My tears could have created oceans
I knew I was open
You're the reason why my heart is frozen 
But still i admired,
I admired your flaws which shall never expire
causing a selfush desire
Well i had to burn out this fire
bcause my heart had been invaded 
In october the month we seperated.


Ps. This was written on 12/14/09 b.c me & my ex would have made a year but this goes to show that things happen. People come and go, & there;s gonna be more then one time people get hurt.

=]

After a day of sitting down over analyzing and rethinking things over
I feel so much better.
Thanks for everyone who encouraged me to do better. 
& think about reconsidering. 
I wasnt fooling no one but myself because I dont ever give up ! 
Ever, because failure is not ever a option ! 
Also ones failure is anothers success with that bein said
Im pretty sure you guys get the point =].
I love life and the few in it. 


P.s Live, Laugh, Love<--If you choose but preferably like lol =]. & as I always say life is what you make it and people are what yu allow them to become

Haiku

Life is a nice thing
Just cherish every moment
& you will be good
          

How im feeling

I really havent been feeling like myself lately.
I dont know what it is or whats going on within me
but a negative stream got me flowing with it.
Im constantly battling with myself to stay positive about anything
Basketball has always been my biggest motivation and love
& I feel like im giving up on that too. 
I know no one can do anything for me but shxt is just real hard.
Im constantly struggling and Im at the point where I really just 
want to give up. No motivation talk or anything. 
Its just hard an complicated. Im only writing this because i cant talk 
to no one because I doubt anyone will even understand. 
Writing is something i always fell back on when words couldnt come out
but its like im giving up on this too. 
ah! I know life is what yu make it but how can someone make the best 
when shxt feels all negative around them?


P.s & i always told myself never let them see you sweat because thats exactly what they want. Im not sweating but damn sure feel like it. I know ima get through this. 

"Dare to be different"

  I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones- John Cage

Life-Henry Ford

        "Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger even though its hard to realize this. For the world was built to develop character and we must learn that the setbacks and griefs which we endure help us in our marching onward. "